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This blog is dedicated to all the humorous, serious, religious, political, fanatical, or otherwise interesting emails that get forwarded too frequently. Shouldn't we be able to find them all in one place?
Monday, May 15, 2006
  Holiday Greetings→
Sorry for the lateness.. I didn't discover this gem until just now...

Please accept with no obligation, implied or implicit, best wishes for an environmentally conscious, socially responsible, low-stress, non-addictive, gender-neutral celebration of the winter solstice holiday, practiced within the most enjoyable traditions of the religious persuasion of your choice, or secular practices of your choice, with respect for the religious/secular persuasion and/or traditions of others, or their choice not to practice religious or secular traditions at all.

I also wish you a fiscally successful, personally fulfilling and medically uncomplicated recognition of the onset of the generally accepted calendar year 2006, but not without due respect for the calendars of choice of other cultures whose contributions to society have helped make America great. Not to imply that America is necessarily greater than any other country nor the only America in the Western Hemisphere. And without regard to the race, creed , color, age, physical ability, religious faith or sexual preference of the wishee.

By accepting these greetings you are accepting these terms. This greeting is subject to clarification or withdrawal. It is freely transferable with no alteration to the original greeting. It implies no promise by the wisher to actually implement any of the wishes for herself or himself or others, and is void where prohibited by law and is revocable at the sole discretion of the wisher.

This wish is warranted to perform as expected within the usual application of good tidings for a period of one year or until the issuance of a subsequent holiday greeting, whichever comes first, and warranty is limited to replacement of this wish or issuance of a new wish at the sole discretion of the wisher.
 
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Psychotic, neurotic, over-emotional, nail-biting geek who managed to find a laid-back husband who keeps trying to tell me it's all small stuff. Oh, and he can cook. I love my husband. :)

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Death of a Soldier
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A Dog's Purpose - From a 4 Year Old
All I Need to Know About Life I Learned from Drink...
Why God Made Moms
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Attorney's Advice (serious one.. not a funny)
The Seven Dwarfs Visit the Pope
Things Hallmark Cards Don't Say

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